What’s with parents these days? - Post 1

Disclaimer: I am not a parent, neither am I an expert, nor do I claim to be one. These observations are of a mature adult who is a little aghast by what is happening in the so called urban, upper middle class, households.

How can any one justify bringing kids to movie theaters? I see children of all age groups being subjected to movies. The most recent was spotting these little ones watching iron man and kites. Now please explain what a 4 year old will understand and take back from a movie like Kites and Ironman. Violence, sex, blood, gore and what not. Is it that the parents don’t fathom this or is it that they themselves are so desperate to watch movies that they just don’t care? Whatever be it, arrange for a baby sitter or take turns to come to a theater but please for heaven sake stop damaging your child’s mind.

I have also noticed a lot of parents employing young kids say 10 – 15 years of age to take care of their children? Now firstly, how can their conscience allow them to do so and secondly are they not worried about safety? I see this young house helper not more than 12 yrs take a toddler to play area of my building each day. And trust me it irks me no end.

Another trend that I largely see these days is that these mushrooming reality shows. Each channel has something or the other happening. Its either singing or dancing or comedy!! So stuff that was done solely for fun is now done for money. Kids are crying after being eliminated and so are these parents. Guys get a life. It’s really not worth it.

On the other end are parents who are adamant to make their child a scholar. A colleague of mine was teary eyed when her son got grade B. I guess life ends at that.

Expectations are sky rocketing. Why can’t parents  let these kids be kids and grow up on their own pace. Why the rush. Why do parents want their child to be a master of all trades? Sports, studies, extra curricular.

Are they not loosing their innocence somewhere? Are parents not rushing the eventuality too soon? Is this right?

Head Head Bang Bang..

Yup that’s the kinda constant feeling up there!! At least twice a week. And when enough was enough, Aman dragged me to the hospital. And when I say drag it actually was that. For the simple universal truth holds true for me as well. “I hate Hospitals”. Yes I do. Immensely. They are the most depressing places possible. The smell, the ambience, the faces, everything. It’s bad enough to even make a healthy person feel SICK.

And the doctor after all the checkup and tests confirmed what I always knew but kept pushing out of my mind. I suffer from migraine. Terrible one at that. So another feather to my unhealthy hat. Grrrr.

Looks like everything around me is getting the better of me. Doctor asked me to relax. Pray, explain how one does that? He asked me to take less stress. Again, who in the world takes stress. Isn’t that something that happens on its own?

Whatever, but I am seriously contemplating taking a month off from work. Going on a sabbatical. Going home to mum. Doing nothing. Maybe it will help, maybe it won’t. It’s not a solution for sure. But maybe its worth a try.

On another note - I am also suffering from the empty nest syndrome, although of a different kind. Younger sister has moved up north. After being together for the last year it’s very difficult to be in the house without her. We still address the room as “her room”. I really hope and pray that sooner than later we shift to the same part of the country where she is. People send in your good wishes.

Why be rude..

When smile can do? No really, why?

This is why I say so:

My return flight from Singapore to Bangalore was completely full. For obvious reasons I couldn’t do e check in, which meant that my getting a good seat was left to chance. And when one leaves things to chance, the worse usually happens. So I was given the center seat in the middle aisle. I was tired and all I could think of was reaching home on time.

So I boarded and settled down with a book. On one side was a middle aged gentleman. The other seat was empty but not for too long. After a few seconds, a huge middle aged woman walked in. When I say huge I mean really huge. I am not being judgmental here. Her size was really really big. Big enough to ensure that half her shoulder was on my seat, her legs were in-front of my foot rest, and the center arm rest was lifted up to accommodate her.

She looked visibly uncomfortable in settling in. And like any other person I too felt bad for her. So I decided to make as much space for her as I could. Just after we had taken off, she suddenly turned to me asking me to keep my hands to myself. I was shocked. I really couldn’t believe my ears. I smiled and said I was on my seat, to which she replied that my elbows were jamming into her. I was stunned enough to forgo a reply.

Now if you are so fat to be on half the seat of your co-passenger, how can you even complain? Here I was, mighty uncomfortable, but still sitting politely to ensure that she was all right. And that’s what I get. Grrrrr.

Bang Bang Bangkok

Now what happens when you are stranded in a place like Bangkok in between 2 flights? Add to it the fact that you are all alone, the Laptop refuses to start, the hotel looks totally uninviting and the head is buzzing with ideas.

So what if you have just landed after a 9 hours flight? So what if you haven’t slept for 3 nights? So what if all your body needs is sleep and rest. So what if the heat and humidity is completely unbearable. When have all these been a deterrent to a “lady on mission”?

That’s exactly what happened last week. On my way back from Melbourne to Bangalore, I had more than a 10 hours halt at Bangkok. Landed, cleared immigration, took a visa, reached the hotel, slept for 1 hour and lo behold, I was all set to undergo the therapy that works like none.

After a quick round of investigation I closed down on 3 shopping destinations. After all there is only as much one can cover in half a day. Well fed and armed with the essentials i.e. lots of Thai Bhat, a cold water of bottle, sun glasses, flat footwear, and focused mind, I was raring to go.

What transpired in between is any girls guess. 8 pair of footwear, 5 Bags, 5 skirts, 30 plus tops, 2 dozen odd accessories, few jackets, some sleepwear, a empty pocket and really heavy bags.

And I am not kiddin’ when I say heavy. Heavy to the extent that my fingers were swollen after a while. I had to remove my rings to give way to the swelling. But when the heart is determined who cares about a bit of pain.

Finally, I had to get back to the airport, not because I thought I had shopped enough but because I didn’t want to miss my flight back home. By now my fingers were as thick at sausages, numb with pain and totally lifeless. So the only way to carry the bags was on my fore arms. Yes, I looked demented, a spectacle worth a laugh. But who cares, behind the layer of pain was a very happy heart.

Writing this today, as fingers took a while to get back to normal. Happy and content and the pain is now gone, but the gain is there to stay!!!

Of Relationship and interests

Cometh the long weekend and off we go to the beautiful forests of Nilgiris. Holi coupled with the weekend is the perfect excuse. Add to it the fact that both Aman and me have been travelling for a while and have not been able to spend as much time together as we would have liked to. So this is the perfect opportunity to escape.

It’s said that couples should cultivate common interests to enhance their relationship. I am really not sure about the cultivating part. As we never had too. We both love travelling and we both are spontaneous with our travels. We love eating out and experimenting with various cuisines. And once in a while we both get down to cooking together. We love the water and swimming is another thing we do together. We love shopping. So we head out together and then go to respective sections only to meet again at the trail rooms. Life looks all set.

We haven’t made efforts to imbibe each others interests, but we have found a way around it. Like in his free time he watches TV and I stick to my laptop. So we sit together but do different things. He is loves playing and my only association with sports is watching it. So I watch when he plays.

We both read, he likes economics, business and strategy, and I stick to fiction. But atleast we go pick books together.

I am sure there are people out there who make a lot of effort to pick up a hobby just for the sake of their partner. We didn’t, coz we didn’t have to. We had our common interests and we had our not so common interests. And we like it that way. For once, I really don’t understand how someone can read all possible business magazines each month and he really doesn’t understand how I can be fixated with Farmville. But so be it.

It might be important for couples to enjoy stuff together. But it’s equally important to have some varied interests as well. Now if 2 people were just the same won’t 1 be wasted?

Long live Twitter!!

Thanks to a bunch of awesome guys I am following on twitter, I could live my moments of history yesterday. Yes, I am talking about the beautiful innings Sachin played. I mean 200 runs in an ODI. This is exceptional and I have a feeling that this record won’t be broken that easily. It was like God himself was thrashing the SA bowlers all over. It was poetry in motion.

All kinds of cricket sites are blocked in office. The popular ones and the vague ones. Everything. There is absolutely no way of knowing the score. I usually call Aman or dad to find out the latest.

But yesterday was different. Although I shall regret not watching this live for a long long time to come, I nevertheless felt the excitement and the tension, sitting right here in office, thanks to twitter.

The countdown started when Sachin was at 185. And then each ball was broadcasted on twitter, in those 140 words. With anti-jinxes, nervous 190’s, slamming Dhoni, it was like seeing everything live.

With hashtags such as #sachinisgod, #sachin, #cricket, it wasn’t difficult to keep track of what was happening in Gwalior.

Thanks to @meIHM @SupriyaMM @confusedsoul @theevilp @manuscrypts @kushanmitra @trailblazr @hitchwriter for making me live those awesome moments!!!

So what have I been up to??

Primarily work which kept me super busy. Then some travelling, first to Delhi and Punjab and then to Ranchi. A wedding in between and then some more trips to Singapore and Thailand.

And in between all this there were some brave decisions taken as well. Some doors were knowingly closed with the hope that there will be opportunities in the future as well. At the same time knowing very well that such things don’t happen too often in life.

But for love, everything seems worth while. Such moments make the bond all the more stronger.

I am visiting my blog after ages today. Thanks to all those who checked on me while I was gone. While I didn’t write anything for the past so many months, I also gave reading my favorite blogs a skip. And yes I missed it.

So when is the right time baby

I am confused.

Do bells ring? Or is it the voice inside? Or is it the bank statement? Or is it those relatives? Or will I dream of it one fine night?

Now you are confused too, right? Well I am talking about the right time. The right time to become a parent? How will I know?

Having been married for more than 3 and half years doesn’t serve the occasion too well either. Polite questionings have long been replaced by direct and often rude enquiries from all sorts of relatives. From ducking the questions, to giving polite replies to being rude, I have been there and done that.We were never the ones to base our decisions on what some vague aunty suggested so these inquisitive relatives could very well be kept aside.

But again, how do we know we are mentally ready to for a baby? Living the kind of lives we do, where there is no time for sleep, where careers rule our lives, where we pack our bags and leave for a trip impromptu, where everything happens without a plan. So how will we know if we are ready for the change? The only way to know it is to experience it. And what if we don’t like it then?

Could my feeling very happy when a friend’s 3 years old son decides to sit on my lap be taken as an indication? Does it mean anything when I beam at seeing those little ones smile at me? Or the fact that these days I invariable end up picking up and baby talk to some little one at the mall? This is all a very new phenomenon. I was not the types who run after children.

But again, I don’t think this new change can be taken as a cue. So then how will I ever know?

When we got married we thought we would be ready to have a child in 2 years time. After all 2 years seemed enough to settle down. It’s been 3 and half years and we are still as naive about the whole thing.

Looks like I am waiting for some divine intervention. Maybe I should consult a palmist or an astrologer. So all you parents out there, how did you know that the time indeed was right? Do any of you have regrets?